Today was a tad rough. It was one of those days as a mom where I found myself thinking “I have no idea what I am doing”.
The last four days Marlie has been waking up super early. Like today it was 4:45 when she started banging on her wall. When she wakes up she cries and is in a really bad mood. We have tried letting her cry and seeing if she falls back asleep. No dice. She is up for the day. She has been really clingy and sensitive. She is like a little roller coaster, giving kisses one minute and then throwing things in anger the next. Her naps are really short and she wakes up screaming. Her eating habits are all crazy. She won’t eat the things she normally likes. She never wants dinner. Do you know what she wanted for breakfast this morning? Meatballs. What the ..?
I started to think maybe something was wrong. Ear infection, UTI, not quite over the stomach flu? So today off to the doctor we went. And you know what he said? “Nothings wrong, she’s just being 2.” And I’m thinking … “Seriously? Because this is so hard.”
I gave myself a pep talk on the way home about changing my own attitude and outlook and it will help the whole situation. I decided we should do something fun and light hearted to turn things around. I took her to McDonald’s for lunch. What kid doesn’t love a little Mickey D’s date with their mom right? Well, she took one look at her hamburger and fries and tried to push it off the table. Just a dirty look and not one bite. Nice.
The worst part is she is going through a scratching phase. She has never scratched anyone but Shane and I and only when she gets mad about something. Let me tell you, it stinking hurts. Her tiny nails are really sharp. It is a bit like having a kitten. A sweet little fluffy kitten that you want to snuggle with and then...in an instant...it is clawing at your face. We both have some battle wounds that are still healing. Seriously Monkey Pants, you’ve got to quit.
The day is done. It ended on a good note with jammies and hugs and books. I know that it was just one of those days. One of those hard mommy days where you can feel the weight of responsibility to care for your little person…and it feels extra heavy.
This mom stuff is hard. I’ve got the scratches to prove it.